Times have once again changed and everything seems so different, the people that are closest to me are once again being pushed so far away and this time, this time i did not expect it, i did not push them they slowly drifted away, and it comes to a point in our life where we learn the people closest to us are the people that will hurt us more in the end. We are all going to one day fall, but who has there hands ready to catch us are the people we will turn to when we fall, and sumtimes we do not know who they will be, somtimes they just are not the ones we would expect but as time progresses we learn who really had been there and who hasn't been there at all.....I am tired, tired of thinking i have found a good friend it has just come to the point in which i will completly give up and not even try any more cuase at times it seems to be only that of a foolish thought. Only a though that one day someone will be there to hold my head up when i cry and be there for me in times when i would truly need..time changes and so do we, so do the people we talk to, so do our heros we sometimes lear that our heros truly do not exsist and lose thoughts of our own future but one day we will all discover ourselves....for life is one big discovery and that is all that will occur..but when will it ever make sense?

Somewhere this world makes sense,
all that we go through eventaully benefits us
and what we learn we finally use
but somewhere along the way, we always seem to get lost
stumble upon a stone and sometimes,
we never find our way back

Reach inside my soul, Can you read what I am truly feeling,
My blood inside stays still, as my veins pulse and prepare to pop,
Don't worry about me, I swear to you I am not okay,
I am screaming out these desperate cries for help,
I need to know that someone is out there willing to care,
I need to know that I am not only needed, but Need to know that somwehre,
somwhere in this wolrd I have an actualy purpose,

I am sick of crying to you my tears of despair,
I am tired of feeling like nothing even matters,
I will bream away from here, this hole that I lie in, it will one day be gone
All that I have ever come to know will be shot down again,

Once youve travled down the road of reality,
once you've fallen out of the little fantasy world that everyone has there head in,
You find that there is so much more to know,
there is so much more to life, some many things that we as humans over look,
Can we please, maybe for one second open our eyes and see what really goes on around? That the little girl sitting next to you smiling is really crying under it all,
that the little girl that found her way to your door step isn't selling cookies, that there is so much more she wants.  She will offer you her cookies, but give you a solem tight look, Stare her in the eyes and see her for all she is

It's not all innocent,
People are well aware of the suffering that goes on around them
they just are to selfish to care

Look me in the eye and see me for who I am
Look at yourself in the mirror and see yourself for all that you are 

                                Realize...We're really not all that different

my pain my heart my hurt my sadness,
my life, my scars, this misery,
everyday I wake im always breaking,
in not to long i'll be a part of history
noe on cares that i am fading,
no one see that i will die,
before anyone will reach sadness,
I'll be dust and live in memory

before tonight you'll se my shadow,
before tommrow i'll be in your dreams,
but when you wake up in the mornging,
there will not be any part of me to see

^^ A song im workin on

                      Your here again, in this exact spot, the spot you ran from the
                          spot that you left, you run and hide from all thats around 
                                              ,you, but instead it all multiplies
                                           trying to fall away from reality, trying to hide in
                                              ,your dreams, but all it does is make living                          ,even more of a nightmare...to fall into and angels arms 
        to lay in the hands of the devil, to reach to the highest point, only to fall 
           ,again, you fell, you fell again, and now and now, your here yet again
            your here once again, no further than where you began, no further
                 than this spot, this one spot, here in this spot where it all began